Day 14 of countdown..what stress can do to your journey

 Blessed be and Goddess Bless everyone. Sorry for the absence for a few days but it was unavoidable. I had to miss Monday and Tuesday of this countdown. The plan was to have Day 12 and Day 13 touch base on simple things like sitting still and not exercising at all. and the effects of not doing anything can mess with your weight loss journey. always try to do something. and physical illnesses and chronic pain can take a toil on your body.

Now onto Day 14. What stress can do to your weight loss journey. Stress can be the biggest damage there is around. One thing that can remind you of the obese life and the bad eating habits you use to have is a tragedy  or stress. That moment in your life when you have to decide between eating like a pig and binge eating or sticking to the strick lifestyle you have lived for how ever long you have had the surgery. The one thing you must remember is that you are not the same person. you must know that you still have control over your own destiny. and that food is no longer the blanket you need. your own self confidence and will power. Over the past several days this has been my own battle devastating news has shook my household and i stood at that crossroad ready to just fall and give up. just wanting to curl up and sleep. but when stress is slamming on you. your weight loss journey does not stop. you still have to have at least 64 oz of fluids, you still have to have your supplements, and you still have to get your protein in. and you still need to watch your portions cause you will make yourself ill and do more damage than good. always know that you are in control of it not  the other way around.

the positive thing of the day is simple...i know i can go on..no matter how much my mind tells me otherwise

DAY 11 OF COUNTDOWN IS...EXERCISE MATTERS

THIS IS A INTERESTING TOPIC FOR ME...EXERCISE.

So let me first start by saying..I believe the doctors when they say exercise is truly important to reach and maintain the best results. With that being said i also would like to state that i personally have a wonder team on my side. that is made up of not only my weight loss surgeon, my nutritionist, my primary care physician, my cardiologist, as well as my rhuematologist, and my personal trainers and physical therapist. they all have put there input in when it comes to the amount of exercise and the types of exercise that i am allowed to do. because of my physical limitations with my disabilities. one thing that some people have a illusion of is that they believe that disabled or people with medical conditions go have weight loss surgery and after losing a little of the weight poof the conditions are gone. this is so not true. in many cases me being one of those cases. some illnesses actually can become worst. and also dormant illnesses that were being hidden by the large quantity of fat and the fluid retention and all the complications from that. once a amount went away. those hidden issues was able to be found and a entire new set of issues were found.
but one thing is certain..no matter what..even the smallest things be it walking around the house, going for light walks. leg lifts, old exercise tapes. anything. every little bit helps. just do a baby step ..cause every baby step is one more step than the day before.

positive thing...surviving through all the things no matter what

DAY 10 OF COUNTDOWN..EATING THINGS YOU ARE NOT USE TO EATING

DAY 10 IS REALLY SIMPLE...ITS ABOUT EATING THINGS YOUR NOT USE TO EATING.

Something i learned very quickly is that once you undergo weight loss surgery. YOUR TASTE BUDS WILL CHANGE. That is no joke. The taste of some things that you once love may truly turn your stomach  post op. while things you never imagined eating before will be the only thing you crave. Now let me give you a few examples of some of my lovely struggles i have endured. now mind you these are my own personal struggles i am in no way a guru. or some profession. and any statements made here are not law. this is just my own personal blog. i would hope you will take the time to listen to your nutritionist as i do mind. it is very important to do so. Now with that said..on to my struggles.
One of the first struggles occurred directly after I came out of post op. about 3 days or so. i had just been released and was adding the dried powdered milk as instructed to my blenderized food. well lets just say my pouch eat times i injected it did not agree. then i tried the skim or 1% milk in items. up it would come or out it would come again. little did i know due to lack of information given. that in some cases early post op rny there is a chance that you can become lactose intolerant now the good news is that it does go away in most people. but until then. welcome to soy milk. Red Flag for me..i remember always swearing all day hell nah i will never drink soy milk..bwhaha..want to bet..guess what..i will drink silk unsweetened soy milk with the best of them. had that blending up shakes like a bad ass..lol. but can not lie i was happy as hell to finally taste 1% dairy again. lol
now other things you will grow to enjoy is...baked foods. and even fish if you are not allergic to it. and yes even turkey burger meat. skinless chicken breast. so many things. and there are tons of recipes to make. so many helpful cookbooks out there. you just have to ask or look. always ways to find them.

so to all that read this...always know...you may not like what you see but just give it a chance. the healthier stuff is..the better chance you give your body to learn to renew and revive itself into the new you.

positive thing...each day i write i remember a little more of what i thought i forgot.

DAY 9...WATER ...THE NEXT GENERATION

WATER THE NEXT GENERATION...WELL YOU WOULD THINK THIS WOULD BE EASY TO TALK ABOUT BUT IT REALLY ISN'T IN SOME WAYS.YOU SEE...WATER IS A MUST FOR ALL CREATURES TO SURVIVE. BUT THE AVERAGE PERSON DOES NOT DRINK THE REQUIRED AMOUNT DAILY. MOST PEOPLE GET DEHYDRATED MORE THAN THEY REALIZE. NOW THAT IS JUST THE NON SURGERY PEOPLE. BUT AS WEIGHT LOSS SURGERY PEOPLE. WE HAVE TO BE ALOT MORE CAREFUL. YOU SEE WE CAN BECOME DEHYDRATED IN A MATTER OF DAYS. 2 OR 3 DAYS OF NOT DRINKING AT LEAST 48-64 OUNCES OF WATER/NO CAFFEINE LIQUID. AND BAM WE HAVE HEADACHES AND USUALLY WILL NEED IV. NOW THE REASON I SAY THE NEXT GENERATION IS ACTUALLY THE SIMPLE PART. CAUSE FOR SO LONG WE DRANK WATER DAY IN AND DAY OUT. IF YOU MIXED WATER WITH ANYTHING IT WAS KOOL-AID WITH SUGAR..REALLY BAD FOR WLS PATIENTS..CAUSES DUMPING. NOW IT CAN BE MADE WITH SPLENDA, TRUVIA, OR SWEET AND LOW. SINGLE SERVINGS OF A FLAVORED DRINK THAT WAS NOT SUGARY WERE CRYSTAL LITE..SADLY IT CONTAINS ASPARTAME. FOR ME THAT IS A DEATH SENTENCE.  BUT NOW..AS THE WORLD AS EVOLVED. SO HAS WATER..FOR ONE WE HAVE VITAMIN WATER. THE ABILITY TO ENJOY  WATERS LIKE SOBE WATER , ZERO WATER, FLAVORED WATERS, SOME CONTAINING ASPARTAME, SOME CONTAINING SPLENDA, SOME CONTAINING TRUVIA, AND SOME ACTUALLY CONTAINING ANOTHER ARTIFICIAL SWEETENER. YOU WILL SEE ALL THIS ON THE LABEL. MOST WILL ALSO SHOW SUGAR ALCOHOL SO IN SOME CASES SOME PEOPLES POUCHES DO NOT AGREE WITH THAT ANYMORE. YOU WILL LEARN THAT AS YOU GO. MINE IS LIKE HEY GIVE ME MY SPLENDA AND TRUVIA AND EVEN SUGAR JUST GET UP OUT MY WAY..BWHAHAHA.  NOW ONE OF THE BEST THINGS IS..EACH DAY WATER EVOLVES MORE AND MORE. SO THAT YOU DO NOT GET BORED WITH IT. EACH DAY COMPANIES WORK TO FIND WAYS FOR YOU TO ENJOY DRINKING WATER WITH OUT WANTING TO HURL OR FEELING LIKE YOU ARE A WATER FOUNTAIN. NEW COMPANIES LIKE MIO HAVE COME OUT WITH FLAVORED DROPS TO ADD TO WATER. CRYSTAL LITE WHO HAS BEEN OUT FOR EVER. WHO USE TO ONLY CARRY THERES WITH ASPARTAME. NOW HAS RELEASED CRYSTAL LITE PURE...WHICH INSTEAD OF ASPARTAME IT HAS TRUVIA IN IT. FOR PEOPLE LIKE ME THAT ARE ALLERGIC TO ASPARTAME. SO WHEN YOU SAY OH I HATE WATER, I HATE DRINKING DIET DRINKS. OR EVEN I AM ALLERGIC TO ASPARTAME SO I CAN'T USE ANY OF THESE AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO GET. NOW YOU KNOW. ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS READ A LABEL. REMEMBER WATER HAS ENTERED A NEW GENERATION..

positive thing of the day...i learned that people enjoy my countdown. it felt good

DAY 8 OF COUNTDOWN...YOU MUST PUSH ON

So the message today is simple. You must push on. It is often one of the first words out of any persons mouth when you hit a stall in your weight loss surgery journey. I QUIT. or Its broken. No dear one your pouch is not broken. you are on a stall. they happen. to be factual i have been on a weight loss stall for way over 4 months now. if not mistaken i do believe its actually 5 months. But you gotta accept that you gotta let your body catch its breath. and sometimes it takes longer than others. STALLS HAPPEN...so don't stress. and most of all don't quit..don't go back to your old habits thinking that if the weight is coming off then why do all the rules.
Also one of the things i have noticed along my journey is simply that we as human beings are so quick to take on more than we are expected to. we never learn the word NO. we will so quickly tell a doctor no. a child no. but let it be yourself that you gotta tell no..and oh hell nah you are not gonna tell yourself no. you will run around doing everything. instead of demanding that others do there part. then you become so over stressed that you crumble. stop trying to be a super hero..if we were expected to be one we would have been born with capes..last time i checked i was not.  chin up and wise up..you do not have to take on the world alone.

positve things..hmmm...i found the strength to push through all that i feel just to survive another day

DAY 7 OF COUNTDOWN..STRESS AND SUCCESS

Stress and success do not agree. when you are trying to achieve the my productive weight loss surgury results. stress is one thing that can dampen your journey. the word stall comes to mind. so many things cause stalls. not enough protein. not eating well. and even stress. now you say..hey dixie how is that possiable. its very simple. when we get stressed out..we through all the rules out the window. we start grazing. we start drinkin with our meals. we do not stop drinking before nor wait to drink after. all in all we just revert to the old people we once was. food has way our security blanket and it takes more than a day, a week and at times even a year to break that habit.

simply remember something. there is a reason you did the procedure. you did not do it cause you was hell bent to just be skinny. hmm well maybe you did. but honestly i did not. i got a man that loves me no matter what size i am. we smile and laugh and enjoy who we are. and he loves me if i am skinny or big. so in other words i did this cause i wanted to get healthy. but even i can say that stress is my enemy. i forget to eat slowly. i forget to not graze. all in all i just really forget to not fall back into the old ways. and that is what causes failures.

sooo remember you are human. pick yourself up and dust yourself off. and do not let stress get to you.

positive thing..i can now identify the problem and i can be honest and admit it

DAY 6 OF COUNTDOWN....GET YOUR PROTEIN ON

One thing of importance to know is that protein is very important to all rny patients.  for rny women we require at least 60-70g of protein a day. for rny men its at least 80g. one thing that must be learned very quickly is that you must know your proteins. whey protein is your happy place. if you gonna get your protein powder on. you can make so many things like protein coffee, protein shakes, or even adding unflavored protein into your hot meal items can be a great way to use powdered protein. and in some cases you can even get a premixed liquid protein drink. some a odd tasting but some are rather tasty. personally i am picky. so i have a protein coffee and a protein shake. then i get my protein bars, and protein from food.

now with that said..lets talk about bars..protein bars..are a wonderful thing. never and i say never leave home with out your emergency package in your car/purse/backpack. what ever you carry with you. if you got a day of shopping, family outings, a family function, holidays at someones house. or just doctors appointments for you or someone in your household. the emergency pack should always contain some water. now you can bring along some mio or a crystal light single if you are not allergic to them to add to the bottled water to stay hydrated. but also a protein bar or two will be a great help. i keep one in my gym bag. and one in my purse at all time. i have even handed them to others when i notice them being worn out. cause sometimes they just are not looking well and or they forgot there emergency pack. plus if you have blood work that day fasting is required. so always take a protein bar..the requirement for a protein bar at least for my nutritionist is simple. at least 19-20g of protein. less than 10g of sugar, less than 5g of fat per serving.  and if possible she likes me to only eat half at a time. also i try to carry a time with me so that i still wait 30mins between bar and water.

now with that knowledge lets discuss something important. you need to know that protein can be found in so many things. meats. be it red meat, turkey meat, chicken, pork, dear meat. you can get you a calorie/fat/protein counter book to help you know what is in what. and learn them. even those little tiny ones at the check outs will help you. if at the time you do not or can not afford the larger one. now one thing also is that you do not just have to get your protein from just meat. please learn that protein is in a lot of things. legumes...aka beans. also fat free re fried beans..are really good and a nice chunk of protein. there are so many ways you need to familiarize yourself with what has protein.

and always eat your protein first. so that if you get full you have the important thing eating.

it still amazes me that something that i learned a year ago. is still stuck with me and really clear in my mind. i am proud of that. i am not as lost as i assumed. that makes me proud.

my positive thing..is that i know my protein and i continue to work hard to get it/

DAY 5 of Countdown...SUPPORT CAN COME FROM ANYWERE EVEN STRANGERS

Today's Countdown topic is Support. Something that is very important. Something that over time many of us lose. Either because the hospital support group that your surgical hospital had offered became to verbally abusive and negative. Or the hours that the support group ran did not comply with your work schedule and your life as a parent. Also many of us have lost the support of long time friends cause as we have grown skinner and the more we continued to stick to the rules of weight loss surgery and have self esteem finally. the less likely those long time friends wanted to spend there time around us. Some truly had us around so that for one we could be the fat person in the group. the one they stand beside or sat beside in restaurants so that it made them in there mind look thinner. or so they felt like if there was a fat person at the table then everyone assumed the big person was the one eating so much. but it was not always the case. An when you got self esteem and self worth poof those friends did not want you around anymore.  Some even have lost what little family support they have had. some have the support of say a parent a mother or father or spouse. but have lost the rest of the families support. family is a tricky thing in general. but once someone in the group has wls alot will become distant or just plain mean. one of the ways alot of wls patients notice that they do not have true family support is that a function with family is extremely difficult to eat at..there is nothing not a single thing to eat that would not make you dump or sick. everything is fried, greasy, uses extreme amounts of mayo instead of lite salad dressing. in some causes items u are allergic to are placed in it. the veggies even are cooked with lots of butter and fat back in it. trust me i know this one first hand. and you find yourself bringing you a prepackaged meal. which in return you feel like a outsider. you do not feel like you are part of the family.  the one support regrettably that a lot of weight loss patients lose over time is there spouses. i recent was researching post op losses and i discovered that post op there is a high amount of break ups and divorces. sadly some spouses just are not ready to be with the skinny self confident person you become after  that had this what they felt like this joyful life of u with no self esteem. it is not your fault. it is theirs. so many spouses are not comfortable with confidence that once you get it they instantly know that the years of neglect and mistreatment. the unloved that they have shown you. will all be noticed and there will be gaggles of men or women lining up or be with you. funny thing is in most cases you only want them. but they become so insecure they cheat, lie, or just leave. dump asses. yep  i called them that. so far i have not lost mine. but it does not mean we don't argue. he drives me cry some times. i do love him a bunch. but he seems self absorbed and the same man that never gave a shit if i jumped in a car and left for hours when i was over 300lbs now seems to get bummed if i don't take him with me when i go to the store. and he uses my health as the reason .funny thing is i had the health back then...its more than men hit on me in front of him..lol. loving that shit.

so now that you know the type of support i am referring to...i want you to understand what i mean by it can come from anywhere. you can get support from a meetup group. a walking group an or even a online support group. now in some cases you may fall in love with a support group at first and over time grow to hate some of the actions of those people. but remember you can get support else were. and never take the medical advice of other patients over your own doctor. do not leave your life in a strangers hands. plain and simple.  also you can find support in your faith, or a therapist too. talk it out. any way you need to. remember you are not in this journey alone. blog, facebook, myspace, what ever you need to. video blog. it does not matter how you do it. just allow yourself to find support of like minded people.


*positive thing of the day*  helping someone else get on track discussing the basics helped me to remember just how much i knew and still know. and i realized i did not forget it. and sharing it made me feel good. i am at peace.

Day 4 of Countdown is WAIT-WEIGHT-WEIGH

Today is the day I focus on a very important word..or shall i say words. Wait. or is it Weight. or maybe its Weigh. hmmm honestly i am talking about all three. when you are reliving the first year of weight loss surgery one of the first things you think of is the amount of weight you have lost. how much you weighed when you started. how long you had to wait to get the procedure done and then how long you waited to get to the size you are now. well this is not exactly what i am referring too. allow me to explain.

WAIT... when i say wait..i am talking about something that is extremely important to do that over time weight loss surgery patients stop doing. some even start short cutting it with in the first weeks to a month post op. but it is actually a necessary thing to continue to keep as a habit. now the thing i am referring to is the amount of time you should wait between drinking before and after your meals. the correct answer is at least 30 mins prior and at least 30 mins after. you are allowed a couple sips if you need to get a piece of food down. but there is a big reason why you do not drink with your meal or directly before or after it. if you have ever added to much water to a plant..and had it leak down into the dish underneath of it..then you will understand it. what happens if you continue to water it even if you already seen a little water come through the bottom. it no longer trickles through. it floods through. well your pouch is small and it needs to register your food is in there. and that you are full. so if you suck down water you are not allowing the pouch time to know its truly full. only causing issues..like over eating. grazing later. etc.

WEIGHT.... when i say weight i mean it as the fact that you need to know the exact amount of weight that makes up a serving or portion of a item. when we are in school they say oh the palm of your hand. a deck of cards. well when you are post op..you actually gotta be factual there is no guessing at times. especially if you are out in public and want to prevent dumping. if you are not sure how much of a certain thing is a serving you are best to back away and not get that item. cause what most do not know is that when you order a burger lets say or a salad or even a entree at a restaurant most assume oh eat the entire thing cause that is a serving. actually usually that is several servings. and for a rny that is beyond several servings. so it is always suggested to place your order and at the time of placing your order ask that when they bring your plate also bring you a to go box so that you can half your meal right then.

WEIGH... now this one is a big one ...weigh your food. at the beginning post op we are all told to weigh our food. i was shocked and horrified to learn recently that a dear close extended family member was actually instructed not to weigh her food, was not told what she needed to get, pretty much just said get a 4 oz container and don't eat over that. it broke my heart. cause she was not informed correctly but that is ok. cause i am helping her now. so that nothing bad happens to her. and it was so heart warming when she came to me asking for my help.  but anyway...weighing  your food is something that in the beginning we all usually do. you are told 4oz. which is a half a cup. when i left the hospital i could not even hold 2oz. at 3 months i still was not up to 3oz at a time. i am now over 4 oz and my nutritionist wants me to drop back down to 4oz at each meal. to break the stall. its hard by its ok. 3oz of a meat usually makes up a portion of protein then 1oz of veggie.  now with that said..you need to get you a reliable scale. i purchased a glass topped digital scale from walmart. have had it for a year and the battery is just now showing low. measures in grams and oz. so that is important.  one thing that is drastically important that some forget. continue to weigh out your food as you progress post op. cause one of the things that we were not doing preop was measuring and weighing. so why would we not want to make sure we are getting those habits right. and if you say we don't have time..hmm do you have time to get fat, do you have time to know you worked that hard and endured this much with this surgery and taking 2 seconds before you plate your food at the counter to weigh it out..is gonna be to much time. its ok....but please consider it.

well that is my knowledge i shared for today

and positive thing.. i stood up for being unique. and not being June cleaver. ..was bashed for not dressing like a stereotyped 40yr old. not sure what they dress like but evidently i am suppose to look like the church lady and June cleaver mated. but being a goth girl and a bikini wearing witch is a bad thing..lol notttt...so i stood up for being me..and i love myself for it..

blessed be

Day 3 of countdown is DANCE IN THE RAIN

now you may ask me what does dancing in the rain have to do with counting down to the year mark of the day i had surgery. well to me it has everything to do with it. You see both in my wiccan life as well as in my weight loss surgery life. when stuff becomes to hard to bare or to stressful i have learned to retreat and also i allow myself to become so depressed due to situations. One thing that occurs that i can admit is that i do not give myself credit for the weight i have lost thus far. I just focus on the length of time I have been on the stall. And the fact that I am even on a stall. I recieved a email response from my bariatric nutritionist yesterday. and one thing she wanted me to do before i read any further was to stop, and breathe. to congratulate myself. she informed me that i had lost more than what the expect wls patients to lose over all on the surgery yet i had lost it in less than a year. this is the section from the email she sent...unedited


First, you need to take a deep breath and congratulate yourself for losing more weight already than average after gastric bypass!!!!!  Starting at 316 pounds at 5'7", your excess weight was 181 pounds and we expect that patients will lose 66% of their excess weight so 119.5 pounds for you.  You've already lost over 128 pounds in less than a year!!!  WOOHOO!!!!!!

Now that in itself made me smile. one thing that did come to me as a suprise. but i am still happy. and that is whhat i am gonna do. everyday there will be something that comes along and dictates that it may not be good or bad in our lives. ben i finally realized that i needed to stop focussing on the stalls and celebrate the achievements. so today that is wut the fact is. we should always remember the joy of dancing in the rain. don't stress over that small storm. just slush around in the puddles of life. and learn to find your inner happiness for there is always something positive out there. 

speaking of positive...my positive thing of the day is....

i am proud of myself for noticing there was a issue. and deciding to reach out to my nutritionist for assistance. and some of the thoughtful weight loss community that is not so negative. blessed be. 

DAY 2 OF COUNTDOWN....MEASURE WHO YOU ARE

Day 2 is really simple. Each day after you have your weight loss surgery. A person becomes obsessed with what the scale says. We do not give credit to the fact that some things in life can not be measured by a flat device on the floor. So many days people define themselves by what they look like or how they measure up compared to someone else. One of the hardest things once you have weight loss surgery is to for one accept that this life long journey you must endure. Yet not only that you must not under any circumstances compare yourself to others and how far they are out. But instead you must measure yourself by your own achievements and victories. Victories are not always seen on a scale. It is not always measured in pounds. Or by that dress size either. Sometimes a victory is non-scale. something that mentally you can say..hey before my surgery I would have don't this instead.
So today..the countdown is simple. today is measure who you are day. but not by a measuring tape. NOPE. you must measure by non-scale victories. grab a journal or loose leaf paper and write down some positive non-scale victories. allow yourself to find the positive even if you are on a stall. for me this is a important day. cause having a stall that is over 4 months long. i have learned that i am now showing signs of body dysmorphia. I no longer see what others see as my achievements with weight loss. I have reverted back to seeing the morbidly obese person i once was. so today is very important.
I also will be finalizing all grocery list today. to shop tomorrow. once i receive the much needed email return from my nutritionist. of her suggestions of items to add to my diet.

so for those who have decided to follow along and or participate..i hope you are finding this helpful. and remember 1 positive thing must be said today too.

*positive thing*  I was extremely proud of myself that when i felt like stuff on facebook was irking me to much i kept my word to myself and logged off. not allowing it to get to me. or dampen my positive journey any longer.

DAY 1 OF THE COUNTDOWN

DAY 1.....PLANNING OUT THE 45 DAY COUNTDOWN AND PREPPING ITEMS

now today is gonna be a little more strenuous than other days..today is the planning day. I know to most people they are like wtf. seriously you start your countdown and not have stuff planned out. and honestly yes, yes i do. The reason for this is simple. If I woke up this morning like i did, said hey its 46 days till my year mark. lets do 45 days of it starting tomorrow. then I know me well enough that I would procrastinate, also know that my body and my illnesses are unpredictable. so tomorrow I could have fibro fog so bad that I may not even remember that i wanted to do it. So by jumping right on the bandwagon today. and forcing myself to instantly start. and using the 1 day to prep items, plan out the other 44 days of things to do. then i am still productive. also due to income my shopping can not even be done for some items till after tomorrow. so this way i can have list ready. and i can be up and out the door with the hubby and child in a row ready to do what needs to be done.
now today i also want to prepare to plan out when i will finish up the summer projects that i started for my wiccan faith. all in all..as long as i am doing something productive towards the outcome then the first day is not wasted and I am not procrastinating. Plus as any one that has ever shopped for a family knows. list are important. so day one is always important. and to a weight loss surgery patient it is very important cause your family may not be on the same eating style as you. for instance my son is extremely skinny as is my hubby. so if i was to have them eating everything i eat. they would be too dang skinny while i would be losing. and that would be just wrong. so its about making sure everything in the house is done correctly.

so day one...is PLANNING AND PREPPING..
planning and prepping includes but not limited to...

planning out grocery list
planning out when to move the work out stuff to needed places
planning out what are the best snacks to help with wls stall
planning out water consumption to prevent dehydration issues
planning out supplements schedule better

prepping includes but not limited to..

pre packaging snacks into small containers
refrigerating cold snacks
baggy and storage dry snacks


prepping also includes but not limited to

finding all unfinished summer projects and placing them in one designated area
preparing a listed time to complete each project
then completing them on such dates

once all this is done.....i have to remember to continue to stay positive..even if that means i have to lay down and log off of facebook. or go game on world of warcraft. it means that i much be in charge of my own destiny. and stay focused.

so my positive thing for the day is..that i am proud to be who i am. and that i love knowing that i am strong enough that i made it this far.

45 DAY COUNT DOWN TILL YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF WEIGHT LOSS SURGERY

45 DAY COUNT DOWN TILL 1YR ANNIVERSARY OF WEIGHT LOSS SURGERY

 In 46 days exactly it will be the exact date one year later that i had my weight loss surgery at University of Virginia hospital. Here in Charlottesville, Virginia. On September 16, 2011 my mother Debra F. Robinson took me to the hospital and Dr. Daniel Kliener preformed a Laproscopic RNY Gastric Bypass. When I awoke my entire life had changed. who would have thought that the same woman that was wheeled into surgery weighing in at 316 pounds that day would be sitting here today almost a year out post op under 200 pounds. The photo above was taken shortly prior to my surgery. and the second half  was taken just weeks ago. you can tell the big difference. What no one knows is though. I have been on a bad weight loss stall (meaning the scale has not budged what so ever up or down) for ever 4 months total now. no matter how strick i am. stalls happen. they prepare us for that. But mentally i am not willing to accept a stall in my weight any longer. i have allowed my body to catch its breath but it needs to get back in the race now. yes i have done a great job so far. but i could do better. I know i could. I have battled dehydration so many times it is not even funny. I have missed supplements so many times that is not funny either. I live off liquid protein cause my body has struggled to accept solid foods. So i have  decided to do this count down challenge. 

For the next 45 of the 46 days till my one year post op mark. i will blog daily. but also i am gonna go back to the basics. and gonna go old school with it. very small multiple meals, pre-measured smalled portions, snacks bagged up, cut and included in my day twice a day, and meals that include veggies and not just a chunk of protein. also now that i have had to take medical freeze at my gym till my body can handle working out in public again. and until i can guarantee my stress induced seizures are all gone ..which so far so good. my hubby is gonna move the wii into my bedroom, and we are gonna move my treadmill into my room as well. so that i can work out in my room. then rest on my bed post work out. each day i will do something. 

The final thing that will happen is that each of the 45 days there will be a count down blog discussing what the days activity or plan of action is for that day.  

one thing that must happen is that the negativity that has filled my brain due to dealing with negative weight loss surgery Patience's that are either bitter for there point in there journey or angry at something in there life. has to stop now. so each day I plan to find something positive and say it as well. 

all are welcome to join in on the countdown and hope others will follow along. be it that you are on a surgery stall, a diet stall, or just want to kick start that healthy part of your own personal life, and maybe get a little happy about yourself  in the process. then so being. feel free to join in. love and light to you and may the goddess bless you.

guess who is back....lol

well after a much needed blog break. i finally have returned to my blogging. i do apologize to my loyal small group of followers. i just needed to get the hell away from all the blogger drama that is out there. when you combine a wiccan life and a weight loss life in one blog or hell combine anything with weight loss life. it is hard to deal with some of the backlash as well as some of the reputation that comes along with being a weight loss surgery patient. i had lived  for so long in the sunshine and rainbow part of weight loss surgery. were all i found was the positive blogs. and yet there was a seedy side of wls bloggers. there were actual straight up cyber wars, verbal attacks, racial slurs, threats on peoples familys, lives etc. and it became just to hard to bare for awhile. and as a wiccan and a empath i could feel so much more than most people when i would view the video blogs and read the actual written blogs. to the point that the stress from it all made me ill. so i took a small unplanned break. tried to only focus on me, some facebook games and my world of warcraft. which i was completely happy with. but now it is time to return i can not allow any close minded people and there own personal dramas to run me away from what i enjoy doing. that would not be the true dixiewitch that i am known to be. so i have returned. and i already got a little blog feast planned out. love and light to you all blessed be